Wickham House: Cary Selden Wickham

The tenth child of John Wickham and his second wife, Elizabeth Selden McClurg Wickham, Cary Selden Wickham was born on August 20, 1811.  

As a six-year-old boy, Cary loved to watch horses with his father, a popular activity. His father bred racehorses, including the famous “Boston,” at his James River Plantation on the border of Henrico and Goochland counties.  

In an 1818 letter to her husband, Cary’s mother, Elizabeth Wickham says, “…the Equestrians who began the night before the last. The children were all anxious to go that is the little ones. I told Cary that the weather was too cold but he did not seem satisfied and said he knew if his Papa was at home he would go and carry them all. His Grand Papa (Dr. James Maclurg) however has promised to treat him and to go with him when the weather is good.” 

English colonists brought horses to Virginia in 1609; gambling on horses increased over the next several decades. While owning horses was only possible for the wealthy, betting on them was far more accessible. Although races occurred well before racetracks were developed, in the 1700s four were developed in Henrico County: Bermuda Hundred, Malvern Hill, Varina and Ware.  

 As Cary grew, he began his education, as his siblings did, being privately tutored at the Wickhams’ home. Virginia planters refused to be taxed to create public schools. A public education system was not created in Virginia until after the Civil War. Education, the wealthy planters believed, was for land-owning (white) men. 

 Inspired by the ideals of republican motherhood, the belief that women should be educated to raise children who understood their duty to uphold republican ideals and to participate in civic life, Cary’s sisters were educated at home in a far more limited range of subjects, which included reading, writing, foreign languages and domestic skills. Other private courses prior to college instruction were offered to boys in Richmond. These included group instruction in elocution, or the art of speaking and speechmaking. 

 Cary attended one of these elocution schools, located in a wood building on the southwest corner of Governor and Franklin Streets – just blocks from the Wickham House. He was a classmate of Edgar Allan Poe’s and was described as “…among the most promising of the Richmond boys,” although Poe won the prize during the school’s public exhibition, probably a few months or years before February 1828. Such courses remained popular for both genders into the 20th century.  

 Like many of his brothers, Cary attended the University of Virginia, during the 1829-1830 session. He was recognized as an excellent student by the university. He later attended the Richmond Theological Seminary.  

Cary died on February 8, 1831, at only 20 years old. The Richmond Theological Seminary paid public tribute to him, and his classmates resolved to attend his funeral. A preamble printed in the Richmond Whig implies Cary died suddenly or unexpectedly. A brief death notice in the Richmond Enquirer recalled him as, “…a young man of very promising talents and great virtue.” We do not know the cause of his death.  

He was laid to rest at the Wickham family plot in Shockoe Hill Cemetery, where his sister Bettina is also buried.  

John Wickham wrote an epitaph to Cary and his sister Susan Decatur Wickham, who died in December 1832 at 18 years old. It was sent to a Philadelphia stone cutter on March 31, 1834 to be inscribed on their tomb: 

In life most deserving objects  

of the warmest affection and highest Hopes of their parents 

 John & Elizabeth S. Wickham  

Who survive to inscribe this sad memorial 

On their early graves 

Consider This 

• How was the education different for the Wickham boys and girls? 
• How was childhood in the 19th century different from today? 
• Based on what we know about Cary, how much control did he have over his own life?
  

 Sources

• Elizabeth Selden Wickham, transcript of a letter to John Wickham (The Valentine, Richmond, VA, February 25, 1818). 
•  “Horse racing and gambling in Virginia,” Virginia Places. Accessed November 10, 2023. http://virginiaplaces.org/agriculture/horseracing.html. 
• “A Catalogue of the Officers and Matriculates of the University of Virginia,” (University publication, Charlottesville, VA, 1830), 9. 
• “University of Virginia,” Virginia Advocate (Charlottesville, VA) July 24, 1829. 
• “John Wickham,” Wythepedia – William & Mary Law Library, modified January 10, 2020, https://lawlibrary.wm.edu/wythepedia/index.php/John_Wickham. 
• Untitled, Richmond Whig (Richmond, VA). February 9, 1831. 
• Untitled, Richmond Enquirer (Richmond, VA). February 12, 1831.   
• According to a page included in the document “Scans of Letter Transcriptions in Valentine Archives PDF” this epitaph is reportedly in Virginia Museum of History and Culture and dated March 31, 1834.